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the sky today is only but another shade of gray through my eyes.
with a tad bit of wind that decided to join the party.
today doesnt have such a good feel.
but hopefully it gets better later on (:

yesterday i had one of those moods again, and all i could do was utter silence between my lips.
it made things a lot more akward on the telephone, because hanging up would cause more hurt, yet staying silent seemed to also increase the pain.

egh i wish it was simple, that whenever i became upset i could just say how i feel, and try fast to find a solution for it.

but it seems that silence IS my strength, and that by keeping silent, i must seem to enjoy lurking in keeping myself at a distance from humanity.

blegh.
i must just be rambeling on about nonsense, because at this point, even i dont understand my own ways. but i guess i dont have to understand myself. i am ME, and thats that i suppose.

on & on, i am out. for now, atleast.

another day;

jet lagged & surrounded by rain.
i love sleeping, yet now, i just feel like im letting time slip through my hands.
not much to do when its pouring outside though.

even though i love the rain, i want to enjoy my time outside while i can!
cause once im back in vegas, im back in the house >:

blegh blagh blaghhh..
hopefully its better tomorrow, yeah?

yet another day;

today was not much in the homeland of sweden.
still suffering from major jetlagg/:
so my two days have only consisted of eating, sleeping, & some quick hellos & farewells.
hopefully my sleep catches up to me soon,
because im ready to venture out and enjoy my time here (:

bleghh;
9 hour time differences make things a little more complicated.

sweden sweden, here i come;

Nothing is like the feeling of traveling.
The airports, the rush of people, the places you temporarily absorb and replenish.
You are put with a select few of people on a plane, somehow bound to their presence, then wisked away, most likely to never see them again.
Its an odd feeling.
Truly odd to me, and its not like im in amateur traveler.
I hate the long waits between flights, the possibilities of being seated to a complete asshole, and just the whole conjunction of stress you are filled with before you reach your final destination.

In stockholm's airport, i was sweating like a damn monkey from the humidity,
waiting three hours before i can approach my connecting flight.

Oh the feeling. & my ipod was about to die.
Funny thing is, the wall plug ins are different, so i was pretty much out of music for a while.
(AND NO SERVICE ON MY CELLULAR)
Yay for me (:

But im done complaining.
I AM NOW IN SWEDEN & I HAVE REACHED MY FINAL DESTINATION.
im happy (:

im just tired of the traveling.. /:

quick withdrawls;

Have you ever unintentionally distanced yourself from the people around you because your so focused on something else?

Maybe im just really fucking strange, who knows.

I just feel like the closer that my departure for sweden is coming, the farther im becoming from the people around me.

Ive been in these weird moods lately.
Maybe its just PMSing, but damn.
These past couple days i just feel like my energy actually has a battery limit, and its continuously stalling on empty -.-
I think ill be backto normal once i get some actual human contact with homosapiens other than my direct family within this household.
Or maybe when i do finally arrive in sweden.

All i know is that at this point, Im ready to leave towards my destination,
and i feel that in order for me to even remotely miss the people and the things that im temporarily leaving behind, i need to be distanced away for a while.

Ill be okay, i know that much.
I just need to make sure that these unintentional withdrawls dont consequently result in having any negative effects.

Over & Out.

random nonsense;

i really wish sometimes that people would just stop their actions, listen, and actually care for once.

is it that hard, i wonder?
for people to lend a hand of compassion, or even some sympathy?
GAAAAAAAWWWSSHHHHH.
im soo disfunctionally retarded! 0_O.
one minute i care, next minute i dont.
but i dont know why?
i think its because i know im lending my hand, only to get slapped on the wrists.
if that makes any sense?
i dont know, im just spilling my thoughts.

people are over-rated.
someone get me some caffeine -.-

anger? affirmative;

Oh tis the joy of having an okay *SLASH* semi-retarded dayy.
it started okay.
well, besides that "oh, why in the world do i even want to get up today" kind of feel.
normal, usual, all smiles and all that good stuff.
but then it started swindeling...
i got the "100% my fault" yells, and more awesome stuff you just dread to live for :P
& also,
i somewhat started to realize even more why i do not enjoy sensitive folk.
(not naming any names).
but just because you dont talk enough, or you dont show 100 smiles per hour, or any of that nonsene, something MUST BE WRONG!? nooooo.... *tsk tsk tsk.
people should know better than that!

but oh well. not everyone can please my strange moods & thoughts.
& nobody can sure as hell read what im thinking anyways.
ALL I KNOW is that i amm trulllyyyy excited to go to sweden.
& it sure as hell isnt coming fast enough!

less than a week, but a million years in my eyes. AHHH @_______@.
time, please go faster for once yeah? you can slow back down after the 11th.
WAYYYYY downnn.

im done;

in a state of melancholy;

"So that's how we live our lives. No matter how deep and fatal the loss, no matter how important the thing that's stolen from us - that's snatched right out of our hands - even if we are left completely changed people with only the outer layer of skin from before, we continue to play out our lives this way, in silence. We draw ever nearer to our allotted span of time, bidding it farewell as it trails off behind. Repeating, often adroitly, the endless deeds of the everyday. Leaving behind a feeling of immeasurable emptiness."

- Sputnik Sweetheart

once again;

AGH! i almost forgot i had this blogg!! D:
rediculous, i know. how could i forget such things?
i randomly get into these moods where i feel like i need to release EVERYTHING off of my chest.
and that is when i blogg (:

i made a tumblr.com bloggarrooo, and that has been my current hobby past time i suppose.
but i just randomly thought "blogspot" & was like HOLY SHIZZAM! i have one of those :D

so, i might as well write another quiet long blog about the life of cherie while im on here.
AHKAJHKJHAKSDJHLAKJH~ INTERRUPTION!! PHONECALL >:
totally harshed my mellow.....
well,
back on track & roll.

ITS 2009! my winter vacation was very very awesome.
spending time with family & such.
the only negative was having winter-break homework 0___O.
BUT!

i have great news! DUN DUN DUNNANANANANAA DUNNNN...
im leaving for sweden in less than a week!
say what? i knnow!
im going from june 11th-august 22nd.
im very excited to be spending my whole summer there.
new adventures & all that good stuff are on its way (:

SO HOW AM I?
very good actually. kind of on the irritated side, but im pretty optimistic & jolly (:

WHATS NEW?
well, school is DONE! (ended june 4th) and now i am officially a SENIOR!
feels pretty damn good, if you ask me ;)

OH!
& im back with my ex, and it has only been but the best of times <3